Conversation Criminals


The Interrogator

He or she can be seen stalking casual conversations and pulling people aside for interrogation. You will immediately recognise their unmistakable modus operandi because they fire quick question after question at you. What do you do for a living?....Are you busy?....Where are you from?.... How long have you been doing the job?

The captive is not allowed to expand, offer additional information or ask any questions. The captive needs to give staccato answers just to keep up. When finished with you, he will unceremoniously dump you and move on to the next victim.


The Braggart

This convict made his way on to the ‘Most Wanted List’ by executing a series of conversational mass murders across the country!

He will boast of his accomplishments, embellish the truth and brag about all of his feats. His goal is to gain status in the eyes of those in attendance so he welcomes an audience. The bigger the group the better, and he has been known to kill multiple conversations with a single appearance!

He also has a sister, braggartia! Although she operates slightly differently!


The One-upper

Members of this conversational crime family are first cousins to the braggart and braggartia.

Whilst the one-uppers generally do not brag first, they always top someone else’s story. They seem to be completely unaware that they have offended other small talkers by constantly trumping other people.

One of their favourite statements is Been there, done that. In that one very short sentence they let us know in no uncertain terms that your conversation is boring and not worth listening to. But their conversation, “well, let me tell you about the time…..”


The Interrupter

Beware the interrupter! This villain comes in all shapes and sizes. The interrupter is characterised by high drive, and a lack of patience.

He thinks he knows what you are about to say and will say it for you. Always keen to point out the error of your ways, he is convinced that he hold all the answers. He is not a dangerous criminal however and is fairly easy to put back on the straight and narrow.


For more information on all the above criminal masterminds, and how to best deal with them when you next meet one, please send us an email, and we will send you details back as to how they think, and how to best safely apprehend them!